Letting go

  "The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes to everyone else's highlight reel." 

                                                               Steve Furlick

When I came upon this quote, I stopped. I sat. I starred. I started thinking about how true it is. With social media being at our fingertips constantly, it has become even easier for us to compare ourselves with what everyone else wants us to see.  I know I am guilty of doing this all of the time. I see the posts that are on Facebook and automatically think to myself, " If they can do that, why can't I," when I should be focused on what I can and will do. I literally have to shake myself out of it because that is NOT how I plan on living my life, and definitely NOT what I want to teach my son.

It seems like today we are so caught up in 'Keeping up with the Jones's" that we forget that life isn't a competition. When you lose sight of what's important, what is there to live FOR? Why do we spend so much time focusing on what others say and do when we have no control over it? When did outdoing others become so important that we forget to do right to ourselves? I don't want to be that mom that is so wrapped up in everything else that I forget that I will never have these moments back with my son. I want to be the kind of mom that puts things off in order to be able to spend more time with him so that when he looks back on this time in his life, he can remember the fun things we did- on a whim or planned. I don't want him to look back and think, "My mom had to plan everything out"

I don't want everyone to just see my highlight reel. I have always been the one who puts on a brave front when inside it isn't always okay. I don't want to be the one that acts like she can handle everything but is breaking down inside. I know I'm strong, but that doesn't mean that I have to be all of the time. Yes, I have my insecurities, but I don't need others to continue to point them out to me. Yes, I know that I am a work in progress. And, I am constantly trying to better myself. I don't need people around me who are so concerned with pointing out the flaws in others that they forget about the flaws in themselves. 

So, instead of focusing on the things that everyone else is doing, posting, or trying to act like they are, this is me. I am not perfect. I am, in fact, far from it. I don't want to be perfect. I want to be me. I want to feel good about who that person is. And I am not going to change because someone else thinks I should. I have enough on my plate without trying to please everyone. And, I know that if I am going to please anyone, I have to start with myself. 

Here's to the next chapter in my life- saying goodbye to those things that hold me down. I can't reach my potential if I am weighed down. And if I can't be more than mediocre, how can I teach my son that he can and should reach for greatness?