As a kid, I always thought that when you turned 25, you had it all figured out. You had your life planned out. You were out of school. You may or may not be married. You may even have kids. But you had life by the horns and were in control. I always knew that when I turned 25, I would be on my chosen career path, with nothing stopping me from getting where I just knew I was going---to the top. Well, apparently there were some miscalculations in my plan, and, well, a few things I didn't know when I was 10. Pretty much the only thing I knew at 25 was that at my next birthday, I was counting backwards!
I graduated college when I was 22 with a BA in theater arts and a minor in communications. I had always said that I wanted to be a sideline reporter/journalist for ESPN. And I was bound and determined for the first two years after graduating. I took jobs in radio and tried as much as I could to land anything for a tv station, but I don't think that is what was intended for this southern belle. The more I thought about it, and the more I got discouraged, I knew I needed to go back to school and get my business degree. My parents had always tried to get me to do that in college, but being the defiant child I was, I never listened. I knew best, right? Well, I married at 24, had a child at 25, and found myself in a room full of 18 years olds at 26. It's humorous to get a peek at "being" this age again, and seeing the same ambition and determination I had the first time around. Granted, it's still there, and maybe even stronger, but this time I know I'm where I'm meant to be. On the first day of class, I always have to smile because it always surprises my teacher to find out that I am not 21 or younger, than I am in fact married, and that we have a child. And it always brings a good laugh for the class, too. Hey, if you can't laugh at yourself....
Looking back, I do have to laugh. Thinking that I would have all the answers and my life all together at 25 was a long shot. I learn something new about myself on a daily basis, and I don't think there is anything I would change about it. It was Eleanor Roosevelt who said, "I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday". Everything happens for a reason, and I think that in order for us to get to where we need to be, we have to take the roads that lead us there, and also try to not burn the bridges. Granted, we may not be able to go back, but the people that we meet along the way, we do meet for a reason. Sometimes they are there for the long haul, and sometimes only a short time. Sometimes you may lose touch and be brought back together again. But it is important to not forget those who helped you along the way. It's also important to follow your heart, and never be too proud to ask for help. Stop and pray at least once a day, and make sure you have a relationship with God. I try to not bring religion up too much, but I do believe that a good and healthy relationship with God will lead you down the right path. You are the only one who can make changes to yourself. Don't wait around for others to do it. As one of my teachers said about marriage: 'Men marry never wanting the woman to change, but they do. Women marry wanting to be able to change some things about their man, but they never will'. The only person who can change you is you. People can help bring something to your attention, but they can't change it for you.
And when it comes to friends, keep those whom you cherish around you. Fake friends will be true to your face, but not to your back. Once again, Eleanor Roosevelt said it best (she was a VERY smart woman, and her husband was one of our best Presidents...talk about a power couple!) "Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart". You will always know who your true friends are. These are the ones that you can count on through thick and thin. They will be there no matter what. No matter the distance between you, you will still keep in touch. If something happens, you know you can pick up the phone and they will answer and be there, and you will do the same for them. These are the kinds of friends that are rare, and if you have a few of them, you are lucky. And I am lucky.
Since I have quoted her twice already, I am going to end with a few more quotes from Eleanor Roosevelt :
"Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give."
"You can never really live anyone else's life, not even your child's. The influence you exert is through your own life, and what you've become yourself."
"We do not have to become heroes overnight. Just a step at a time, meeting each thing that comes up, seeing it as not as dreadful as it appears, discovering that we have the strength to stare it down."
"I have never felt that anything really mattered but knowing that you stood for the things in which you believed and had done the very best you could."
"One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes. In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility"
"Small Minds Discuss People,
Average Minds Discuss Events,
Great Minds Discuss Ideas."
See, I told you she was brilliant. :)
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